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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Lifestyle
Elizabeth Bennett

A new start after 60: I became a foster carer at 75 – and it has helped keep me young

Patricia Swan at home in her garden.
‘I needed something to stimulate my life and fostering has given me that’ … Patricia Swan at home in her garden. Photograph: Fabio De Paola/The Guardian

Patricia Swan was pottering around at home one day in 2022 when a radio broadcast changed the course of her life. “Normally, the radio is background noise, but when I heard a desperate callout for more foster carers in my local area, I had to do something,” she says. She was 75 at the time, so her next thought was: “I must be too old.” However, she looked into it immediately and, on finding there was no upper age limit, she and her husband put in an application.

Six months later, they were caring for a 17-month-old boy and his six-month-old sister.

The process to become a foster carer is a lengthy one and for Swan and her husband it took 26 weeks of meetings and interviews. “I cried when we were accepted,” she says. When the children arrived, it was a shock. “I did think: ‘What on earth am I doing?’” Swan says.

However, the fears soon faded. Over the seven months she cared for the pair, the positive changes she witnessed were hugely rewarding. “The little boy really struggled to speak or eat when he arrived and was often frustrated, but he really calmed down and made lots of progress,” Swan says. With the baby girl, Swan witnessed lots of firsts, such as sitting up, rolling up and cutting teeth. “You really develop a strong bond,” she says.

Before fostering, Swan had been retired for seven years after a career as an executive housekeeper in hotels, alongside raising her three daughters and then helping out with her grandchildren. Her daughter Tracey, 54, had been fostering children, but it wasn’t something she had previously considered herself.

“My daughter had suggested I try it, but I always dismissed her. I didn’t feel I had the time,” she says. Her retirement years before she started fostering were mainly spent looking after her house and garden in Shropshire and her other daughter’s horses. However, she felt something was lacking. “You can’t clean the house every day and I got bored of baking.”

Since looking after the two babies in 2023, Swan has taken care of five children for respite periods and is now looking after three siblings, who are two, five and six, for a longer stint again. Because of her age, Swan signs up for short-term placements, which means taking children for less than a year, normally a few months at a time or as respite for a few days or weeks. This also gives her the opportunity to have a break between placements.

While she and her husband both foster the children, she is the main carer and chooses only to have children under seven. “Older than that takes too much energy. Plus, they are normally in bed by 6pm and I can have a bit of time to relax,” she says. While the children can sometimes be challenging to look after, saying goodbye is even harder. “The transition is always heart-wrenching.”

But she says that fostering has changed her day-to-day life for the better. “The children really keep me young. For example, I spend a lot of time at the zoo now and I hadn’t been to the zoo in years. I love it,” she says. She also thinks it has changed her. “I used to be a bit of a grumpy woman. I think I was bored. I needed something to stimulate my life and fostering has given me that – it’s given me something to live for.”

Swan thinks anyone in good health should consider fostering at her age. “Older people have lots more time and patience and, often, houses with spare rooms and gardens. It’s also much easier to do when you don’t have your own children around,” she says. “Just do it; you won’t regret it.”

She is keen to continue fostering more children. “I plan to do it as long as I am fit and healthy. I might be shattered by 7pm, but the children give me something to look forward to each morning.”

Tell us: has your life taken a new direction after the age of 60?

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