In 2011, a couple of years before the David Bowie Is exhibition opened at the Victoria and Albert Museum in London, I came out as a lesbian. Up until that point I had been exclusively dating men, one of whom I married. Two years later, I was in my early 40s, a newly separated mother of four children, living in the US. I had started to question my gender identity, as well as my sexual orientation, and was looking for some answers.
I was born in England in the early 1970s – before the advent of the internet. As a teenager, my friends and I didn’t have Reddit or YouTube to turn to when we had questions about sex; instead, we turned to pop stars, and in the 80s everyone was messing with gender. Annie Lennox wore boys’ clothes, Boy George wore girls’ clothes, and pop groups such as Erasure and Bronski Beat had members who were out and proud.
