Horses, doves, a cortege of Rolls Royce supercars and amazing flower arrangements were on display in Cardiff as mourners paid their respects to a woman who made an indelible mark on her community.
Hundreds of people attended the wake and funeral for Agnes Coffey following her death from brain cancer at the age of 63. Agnes, who died on March 26 after a seven-month battle with the illness, had nine children, 22 grandchildren and four great-grandchildren. "Big Mommy" — as she was known to younger generations of her family — was revered for the way she cared for her loved ones, brought them laughter and steered them through tragedy.
Agnes was considered royalty in her family and the wider traveller community. The words "she is royal" could be seen on her coffin and many of the displays from the ceremony, while Tarrus Riley's reggae song She's Royal was played at various points. You can get more Cardiff news and other story updates by subscribing to our newsletters here.
The wake started in Newport Road's James Summers Funeralcare on Tuesday evening, before pallbearers carried Agnes' coffin into a hearse topped by the words "Big Mommy" arranged in flowers. The hearse and dozens of mourners' vehicles then headed through east Cardiff — stopping for around a minute outside Conspiracy Lounge on City Road, which was Agnes' favourite shisha bar — and arrived at her home in Trowbridge.
In the yard outside the home, loved ones released pink and purple balloons into the twilight sky while shouts of "go on Big Mommy" rang out. As the balloons rose, family members touched Agnes' coffin and a soundsystem played Goodbye's The Saddest Word, a ballad by Celine Dion.
The hearse moved slowly out of the yard as mourners walked behind with country music filling the air. They then travelled to the Cardiff Oratory church in Splott, where the funeral was held on Wednesday afternoon.
For the funeral, nine Rolls Royces stretched across Carlisle Street while a van with a big screen showed images of Agnes and her family. The supercars were adorned with Scottish and Irish flags — a tribute to Agnes' pride in both her Scottish background and her husband Jim's Irish heritage. Many of the mourners wore tartan sashes and children were dressed in kilts.
After the service, children emerged carrying framed photographs of Agnes, followed by the coffin which was placed in a carriage drawn by four white horses. The horses had been draped in cloths bearing the names of Agnes' family members. A priest threw holy water on the coffin and mourners who had gathered round the hearse.
The procession travelled to Western Cemetery in Ely, where a stunning array of floral displays had been arranged in memory of Agnes' interests and favourite foods. There were larger-than-life models of a McDonald's milkshake, a roast dinner, Nutella spread, Gordon's gin, Schweppes soda water, Pink 'n' Whites chocolate, Nescafe Original coffee, a Red Bull can and ice cream — both Tesco own brand and Mackie's of Scotland.
You can see all our pictures from the funeral in the gallery below.
The models also included a Scottish saltire bearing the word "freedom", a Miss Dior perfume bottle, Cartier watch, bingo card, Swarovski earrings, Johnson's baby powder, a handbag alongside cigarettes, Netflix and Facebook logos and a phone screen showing Agnes with her son Jeffrey, as well as the Candy Crush game. One display depicted a TV remote and ashtray atop a cabinet, another a bed of roses.
Pink and lilac carpets stretched towards Agnes' grave, lined by teardrop shapes showing pictures of her and loved ones. One Old West-style sepia photograph of Jim and Agnes had been blown up large under the message: "Death to us part I will always love you Big Ag". Older relatives were able to sit down in a marquee as they paid their respects.
The cemetery was circled several times by a plane flying a banner with the words: "Mommy loves my children and husband Jim." Lallie Wadham, a country singer who had travelled from Portsmouth for the ceremony, gave live performances of Agnes' favourite songs. As pallbearers carried the hearse along the carpets, she sang Paper Roses by Marie Osmond.
When the coffin was lowered into the ground, the priest recited the Hail Mary and mourners threw their tartan sashes into the grave. There were shouts of "go on Big Mommy" as doves were released into the air, followed by balloons forming the shape of a rosary.
Agnes was born in Dundee, where as a child she worked in a bakery with her father Jimmy. "She loved baking with her daddy," said her daughter Bridget. "She would come home afterwards and help her mother Dorothy with her five sisters and three brothers, because she was the eldest."
When Agnes was about 11, she moved from Scotland to London, and then to Cardiff a few years later. Her family loved the traveller way of life and experiencing new places, said Bridget.
But when the family settled near Cardiff Bay, something led Agnes to a permanent stay in the city — she met her husband Jim. Shortly before her 16th birthday she had managed to get into a three-floor disco in Queen Street. On the top floor, she found love at first sight. Bridget said: "She came in and daddy turned to his mates and said, 'She's the girl for me.'"
Agnes married Jim when she was 16 and they started their life together in a caravan at the Rover Way traveller site. On weekends they enjoyed dancing at the Philharmonic in St Mary Street. Jim worked as a tarmacker and when he got home each day, one of Agnes' legendary meals would be waiting for him.
"She was a great cook," said Bridget. "Her speciality was split pea soup, and when she got older it was called 'Grandma's split pea soup' because nobody else could do it like her."
Agnes was mother to Jim, Bridget, John, Dorothy, Jeffrey, Tony, Helen, Moll and Tom. As a child at the dinner table, Bridget used to love hearing stories from her parents' younger days. She said: "Daddy would always put a funny spin on the situation and mommy would be like, 'Say it proper Jim.' She loved his sense of humour and everything about him. No one could ever run him down, she wouldn't have it."
Though Agnes loved all her children deeply, Bridget believes she had a particularly special bond with Dorothy. "She reminded her of her younger self — they were both very fiery," said Bridget.
Agnes and her daughter Dorothy's conversations would often cause amusement among the family. Bridget said: "Mommy would ring Dorothy up saying, 'You've robbed my bleach, you've robbed my Fairy liquid.' My sister would have the phone on speaker and after a while she'd say, 'Is that it now?' We'd all burst out laughing and the phone would go down."
The family left Rover Way around 2004, moving to a house in Newport Road. "It took a lot for mommy to adjust from living in a caravan, but it was a bigger place for the family," said Bridget. "Daddy wanted to make a better life."
In 2005, Agnes lost her daughter Helen, aged 14, in a tragic accident. She was said to be a beacon of support to her children as they grieved. Moll went through a particularly hard time, but there was "nothing mommy wouldn't do for her", said Bridget. Agnes would ask: "What's the matter my Moll? Where do you want to go tomorrow?" The pair often went on shopping trips together around this time.
Bridget has a 16-year-old daughter named after Helen. "When I had her, it brought comfort to mommy and helped her get through," she said. "We've always spoken about my sister Helen to the younger ones and had her picture up at home and celebrated her."
Agnes struggled to stay in the Newport Road house following Helen's death, so the family moved to a static home in a yard near Wentloog Avenue. Bridget lives at the nearby Shirenewton traveller site and many other relatives are in the area. "We have all stayed close," said Bridget. "None of us have drifted away."
Agnes enjoyed getting presents from her sons on special occasions. When her birthday, Mother's Day or Christmas was nearing, she would sometimes give them a pointed reminder. Bridget laughed: "They'd come with all these gifts and then she'd say, 'You shouldn't have bothered.' But she loved the attention off them and they adored their mother."
"She would phone us all 20 times a day," Bridget added. "It didn't matter what time she woke up, she would be straight on the phone to her children. She called me one day at 4am and said, 'I know your children have taken my phone and put it in the toilet.' And I told her, 'Mommy, you're ringing me on your phone.'"
Agnes was diagnosed with cancer around seven months ago. "She said if it was up to herself she would have been happy to go to her daughter and her mother in heaven, but she fought as hard as she could for the sake of her children and grandchildren and husband."
A devout Catholic, Agnes had many sculptures of Jesus Christ in and around her home. She enjoyed visiting holy places like Rome and Lourdes. And in her final trip a couple of weeks before her death, her children took her to Knock shrine, a place of pilgrimage in Ireland.
On one occasion during the holiday, Agnes danced with Tony at their hotel to the classic country song, Send Me The Pillow You Dream On. Bridget said it is a "lovely" memory for the family to cherish.
