It is a well-known fact that you hate ducks. Why?
First of all, they have weird penises. It’s a corkscrew penis. If there are aliens on Earth, they should look into ducks. They’re also aggressive for no reason. It’s not a lifelong vendetta, but they have a few characteristics that I find discomforting. I’ve eaten a duck or two, smoked a duck. First you smoke it for 20 minutes at 350F. Then you put it in the oven for 45 minutes. I have my own personal duck smoker on my rider. I get to the venue: “I hope you’ve got the smoker up and running, I’m absolutely starving.” You’ll usually find me smoking a duck in the lot before a gig.
