Having a high school crush, as probably most of you will agree, is an inevitable experience in our teenage years. That feeling of excitement but also kind of ‘stress’ when you see the person you like walk through the school corridor, getting ready in the morning and worrying about whether they will be at school today, you know what I am talking about. Well, it’s weird to think that years later we can still remember that one person and maybe still have them in our lives, or maybe have no idea what happened to them.
Speaking about high school crushes, one Reddit user created a thread asking community members to share how their sweethearts ended up in life. Well, stories vary from being incredibly sweet to terribly heartbreaking, so scroll through!
More info: Reddit
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“I think the most important factor of why so many couples struggle to maintain their relationship from high school through college and beyond is the recognition that you've outgrown each other,” shared dating and relationship coach for high-achieving women Sami Wunder with Bored Panda.
“I think the transition that happens from high school to college is the time in our lives where we make significant personal growth, and we develop new interests, values, and goals,” she added. We may not be aware that we are not who we were when we met our partner first, so very often there is just an outgrowing that pushes people apart and breaks relationships.
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Sami noted that another factor that may be a challenge for young couples who came together in high school or college is the geographical separation. “When you're together and you're in the same town, you're in the same school, it's so much easier to nurture your relationship and be close to each other,” she emphasized.
The dating and relationship coach also pointed out that when people come together very young, they often can have this romantic idea about life and love, and that all you need is love. “And then when you step out into the real world, you realize you need to make money and you need to, you know, show up and handle responsibilities, and often that can put strain on relationships,” she continued.
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Now, speaking about the importance of sharing feelings with your crush, Sami shared that she doesn’t agree with this opinion. “Personally, I feel like crushes come and go and it’s important to not keep acting and reacting to every single one. If you start acting on all those feelings, your love life could end up looking like a mess.”
However, she noted that she believes there is something to speak for when it comes to having courage and bravery, to be honest with yourself. “I think what's important then is to be detached from the outcome. A lot of people share their feelings with their crushes to get a positive and that is the dangerous part.”
And do this for yourself. Do this to honor yourself, do this to honor your truth. Do this to be authentic with yourself. Do this to know that in the future, you will have no regrets and that you are honest and upfront about your true emotions. However, do not do this to get an outcome, because that can be really tricky.
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Moreover, Sami noted that it’s important to do it as an act of self-love, so that you don’t regret it in the future. “There is no fear like fear of missed opportunity. If they once knew and they still didn't do anything about it, then you at least knew that you did your part of the process.”
Clarity and closure is also really important. When you have all these uncertainties - ‘does he like me? Does he like me now? Does she like me?’ Just being able to express your feelings is so powerful. “Either you go ahead with that person because they reciprocate or you don't. And you win either way by getting clarity and closure.”
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Finally, we asked Sami Wunder to share the most common myths about high school relationships and she said the first one is the belief that they never last. “And I don't believe this is true. I have personally encountered so many coaching clients who are happily in love with the person they met 20 years ago, at high school or in college. So I have to say that every relationship is different.”
She added that another myth is that people often have the idea that true love is going to last effortlessly. “So if I met my person in high school, and we've known each other for a very long time, it's just going to last. And that is so wrong,” she emphasized.
“No matter where you met your sweetheart and how you met them, and how young you were, and how well you know each other, every romantic relationship needs nurturing, needs attention, needs time and effort. So many people take that for granted when they've known somebody for a long time.”
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“I also believe that there's a myth that high school relationships are not serious,” added Sami. “A lot of people think that people who come together in high school, it's just a high school relationship.”
People tend to assume when you meet somebody so young, you are not mature, you don't know what you're looking for. And while there could be some truth to it, like we're still in the process of maturation at 16, and 17, and 18, there are plenty of examples where people have found each other's soulmates and people have found their soulmate at this stage of their life.
“Every relationship, no matter when you got together or how you got together, should be given its due chance,” pointed out Sami.
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So guys, don’t forget to check out Sami’s website!
And do you remember your high school crush? Share your stories in the comments below!
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He grew up in a broken family, and both of his parents were addicts. They divorced when he was 4 or 5. His parents remained addicts. In high school, his mom was arrested and ended up in prison on a 10 year sentence for d***s and child neglect.
After graduation, he didn’t go to college. He worked at a bar for a few years before going into real estate, which turned out to be his passion. He’s now working as an operations manager for a nationwide real estate company, making six-figures while his wife is a stay-at-home dog/cat mom and working on her own small business.
I’m his wife. Life is good. :-).She’s a doctor now. Dual specialist. Last I heard, she’s in the kitchen, making pancakes for dinner tonight for our 3 year old son.She passed away in a car accident a month before we were to be married. We started dating when we were 16. She passed away at 19. I’m 64 and still a day hasn’t went bye that haven’t cried for her she was my everything.She was lovely. We were in a small, close knit group of friends. I remember going out one Friday evening and she held my hand. I was ecstatic.
I know today that she didn't fancy me or even see me in that light as we have discussed it. She knows she was my school crush.
I moved away when I was 16. Saw her once, briefly when I visited when I was 18 and always looked for her when I returned to my home village.
Friends Reunited was a website where you signed up, put in your details and it connected you with people from your school. She hadn't joined and I was gutted.
Then she did. I paid immediately for full membership so I could email her through the site..... She didn't respond for 2 years. I know now that it was because she's not really bothered with social media. Back then, there was no Facebook or anything. She used the internet for research and study only.
She did well for herself. Got a BA Hons and a law degree. Things went downhill for her after she chose to meet up with me. She's got terrible taste in men....
Cos we've been married for 18 years this year and have 2 daughters. She's now a mental health nurse. Still got terrible taste in men hahaha
Edit to add. We physically met again when we were 32. Now both 51.Mine worked for my dad when we were teenagers but he was 3 years older than me so I was too shy to really ever talk to him and his dad told him to stay tf away from me because he was kind of a “bad boy” type of kid lol. He was the most handsome emo boy my little 13 year old self could have ever dreamed of ?seriously though, he was gorgeous (still is absolutely stunning) and eventually when I was 15 my dad sent him to pick me up from school and I was so excited to have a chance to hang out with him. Nothing came of it because he ended up moving out of state and didn’t hear from him again for many years. He had a rough home life and bounced around from place to place. Eventually we reconnected on MySpace a few years later when I was 18 or 19. Nothing came from that either because I had a boyfriend and had just moved in with him. Honestly though, I would have dumped him immediately as my life was beginning to get really dark with abuse, eating disorder and addiction. He found me on Facebook when I was 25 and he was 28 and we started talking and hit it off and immediately began dating. I was in a really bad place working as a stripper, webcamming, abusive relationships, anorexia, and addicted. He got me clean and showed me I deserved better than the life I was living. The first day we hung out together was the first day I didn’t drink or [take illegal substances] in years. I felt safe and like I could be myself without judgement or worrying about if he would hurt me. It was hard to get used to a healthy relationship after being so used the toxic lifestyle I had been living and I definitely was not easy to deal with for the first while. We have now been together almost 8 years and married for almost 2. We have 3 children and live a quiet life in the country and I’m thankful everyday to have found him. We may not be rich or have lots of fancy things, but we have true love and loyalty and I feel safe for the first time in my life after finding him. I have purpose and my life has meaning. He is our rock and the best man I know.We are married!! He is snoring on the bed behind me while I'm on Reddit, lol.
It still blows my mind that I ended up with him.She got married....had 2 kids....and sadly died of cancer.
What a sweet girl she was! I was so sad for her husband and kids....still sad about it.I was 14. At the beginning of the new school year, I was running late to my new English class. The class was too full to accomodate me/a few others, so at the last minute I was switched to another English class with different people/teacher etc.
I walked into class, I sat down and I saw ‘him’. I remember just feeling this intense admiration and awe because he was just SO handsome. He was quiet, kept to himself, almost mysterious.
9 years later, we are still together, and very glad that I was running late that day and therefore got moved into his English class or else we would have never met. ?.He disappeared off social media, moved somewhere really remote and hasn’t kept in touch with any of his many, many friends for some reason. Last I heard not married and no kids.Turned out we were both gay. Most hilarious breakup I've ever had. Hands down the best, but we fell out of touch. But yeah he said something along the lines of, "I don't know how I feel about kissing women, but I have enjoyed sex with men," and I gotta say I felt about the same way reversed. Every man I've ever thought I liked has been extremely gay. And I didn't start dating women until after high school.He died. He went in for a common surgery, some kind shoulder rotator cuff thing, and developed a pulmonary embolism. It can happen to anyone after surgery. He went to recovery, was discharged from the hospital two days later, then died in his sleep that night at home. He was 35 years old.
He co-owned a local Irish Restaurant and pub with his best friend. Never married, no kids, but adored his siblings children. He was a d**k when we were young, but grew up to be a pretty nice guy.She was a mom of two kids. I have no idea who the father is/was, but she od'd on what I assume is [illegal substance] though the town paper doesn't officially say. She is the third person in my high school class of only 90 kids to pass from this. She was a smart and pretty girl who brightened any room. I was in shock when I heard. Don't do d***s people. Edited a word, I’m a bad speller!He married someone other than me. We did date and break up. He has put on a considerable amount of weight. Six years into his marriage to his wife he reached out to me on Facebook to rant about how bad his marriage was. I told him I wasn’t his therapist and he should probably go talk to a professional if things were not working out.He ended up marrying his cousin. Same last name and everything. They have two kids. I dodged a bullet in not actually dating him. But then again we wouldn’t have ended up together because we aren’t related enough I guess.I actually dated my crush for a bit, until I left the state for college. Parted as friends. He went to school locally and became an elder-services social worker. After a failed marriage with the girl he dated right after me, he found his person. She’s great and has a daughter he loves as his own and is hugely involved in raising. He’s one of the good ones.Became a neurosurgeon with a very good looking wife + 2 children. He was a super sweet and nice guy to all with really good looks. All the girls were smitten.She’s an award winning filmmaker.She [took her own life]. Found out later she had a crush on me too. F**k life sometimes.Man, if you had asked this 5 years ago I would have said, living exactly the charmed upper middle class life everyone expected him to live. Degree from a good university, beautiful wife, beautiful home, kids, trips abroad. The good life.
Came to find out he was subsidizing that life with a smidge of fraud and a touch of addiction to prescription pain medication. We’re talking a federal investigation.
Truly the biggest shock of my life.Googled his name and found out he lives a good life in Hawaii.She failed out of engineering and that's the last I saw of her.
I found out that a while later that she went back for accounting. Ended up in NYC working for Deloitte.
We're from rural Canada. I think she did pretty well for herself.He was my first experience with being treated with actual respect and care, and was a big teddy bear of a man. But I was so used to being an option, not THE choice, that I didn't know how to accept his love. We dated off and on for a few years while I was in college in NJ and he was back in upstate NY working as a caregiver in a group home. I loved him, but I wasn't at a point in my life that I knew how be loved BY him. It was too serious, too intense. I was young and in college, and he was talking marriage and kids. It scared me. I left, for the last time, in 2010. We stayed close, though. He was truly my best friend.
He passed away of a random heart attack at 32, back in 2020. I caught up last year. I pass him in July. I was never supposed to be older.
I wish things had been different, but at the same time, they happened exactly how they had to. I do wonder sometimes... what if I'd stayed? But I try not to dwell too long on "what if"s.He’s still hot. He’s a toxicologist and is married, has one son. Beautiful home, but they’re so f*****g religious it’s weird. Huge picture of Jesus in the living room. I think I dodged a bullet with this one.They straight up zero presence on the internet after high school. Cannot find them on any social media whatsoever so honestly I have no idea.Every single guy I had a crush on in high school either joined the military or became super religious or some combination of both. Something to unpack there, I’m sure. .Successful. He's now the nursing director at some hospital.Married to an army officer. I happen to know the guy. I still pray to god for her happiness.She was my high school crush, kind, caring, just full of life. We've become close friends, I proposed but she chose the other guy. Wish them nothing but happiness. They were married until she came home and found her husband in bed with his coworker, went into a social media breakdown for a couple of months until she disappeared completely. Last I heard she moved to another city to begin a new life. If I weren't married I'd go after her like in the movies. Sherry wherever you are I hope you found happiness.She just had a baby and is happily married I never told her.Dead. Liver cancer. While still at high school.
