We all love the Olympics because there is nothing quite like screaming passionate instructions at the TV about a sport we learned existed exactly five minutes ago. But we need to address the elephant in the stadium: some of these events are purely unhinged.
There are actual humans out there voluntarily flinging themselves off ice cliffs or doing backflips with knives attached to their feet. Who authorized this? Why is "life-threatening sliding" a hobby? And why is the Winter Olympics a million times more unhinged than its summer big sister? We have more questions than answers, so let’s swan dive into Olympic sports that prove humanity has absolutely zero chill.
